Posted by Cordelia on August 16th, 2012 under Uncategorized
Spoiler’s do need read if you dont want to know
Scene 1 (Cold Open): Comic Book store
Leonard, Sheldon and Raj are browsing the $1 comics cart. Stuart is at the counter. Raj says that he wishes cosmic graze would hit Howard so he can get super powers and become a superhero. Leonard says that Howard already wears skin tights so he’s halfway there. Sheldon says they forget something: Villains are always after the hero’s friends. Leonard tells Sheldon not to worry because even if he gets kidnapped, he’s sure they’ll let Sheldon go.
Stuart says “So Howard really is in space?”
Leonard: “250 miles away that way” *points both fingers up*
Sheldon corrects Leonard: “253.2”
Leonard:” Like I said, they would let you go.”
Raj:” I wonder what he’s doing now?”
They mention a few things like charting maps and pointing telescopes. Sheldon says he’s not going to lie, he envies Howard because he’s probably watching the universe in all its majesty, and “I’ll explain how it works when he gets back”. In the last take, the line was changed to “he’s watching with uncomprehending, dim eyes, like a cat looking through an airport pet carrier”.
Leonard says that it is not all as glamorous as it sounds. They have to recycle their own urine for drinking. Stuart says that nobody wants his urine. In the first few takes, the camera is on Sheldon getting his reaction to Stuart’s comment. In the last take, they opened the shot to include Raj and Leonard. Leonard’s back is to Stuart so he turns around looking confused.
Sheldon says: “No matter what, this experience will change Howard’s life forever”
CUT TO: Space Station. Interior gallery. There’s zero gravity so Howard (and Dimitri in later scenes) are floating around. Howard has a beard. His hair is all tousled. He’s wearing a NASA shirt and cargo pants. (He looks like Simon on break. Kind of weird to see Howard without his usual getup)
NOTE: All Space station scenes were pre-taped and only shown once.
Howard is speaking to his mom on the speaker phone. She’s complaining that she heard H/B are planning to move out. Howard says he’s married now and they need to move on with their lives. Mom says his wife is trying to take him away from her. Howard says that’s what wives do (or “are for”, not sure). When mom hangs up, Howard says “Thanks, Ma. Space is ruined”.
Scene 2: Penny’s apartment
Close up of Amy’s face. She has bleach cream on her upper lip. Penny is applying it to her. Amy says that now she’s going to have some fake blonde hair like her beautiful fake blonde friend. Penny says “My hair color is natural” (unconvincingly). Amy gives her a “really?” look. Penny says “It is now!” or something like that.
Penny asks Amy if this is her first mustache bleaching. Amy says no, she did it in high school “but I fell asleep and got second degree burns”. Penny says “Ouch” and asks if somebody gave her a hard time. Amy says she had a cover story, “herpes”. Penny says “way to zig when you meant to zag”.
Penny asks Amy if she and Sheldon have exciting plans for tonight. Amy says “Yes, according to our relationship agreement, he’ll take me out for our anniversary date and engage in what onlookers know as casual displays of affection”. In the first take, Penny reacts with a confused look. In the second take, “casual displays of affection” was changed to “physical intimacy” and Penny said “That’s hot. Remember to wear protection”.
Amy asks Penny how things are going between her and Leonard. Penny says it’s been awkward since Leonard proposed during sex. Amy says: “Boo hoo. If Sheldon proposed to me during sex, my ovaries would grab on to him and hold on for dear life”. Penny’s reaction:
Scene 3: University cafeteria (next day)
Sheldon and Leonard are sitting at a table. Sheldon asks Leonard if he’s familiar with a certain principle (I didn’t catch the name). He doesn’t let Leonard answer and then goes on to explain the principle, something about how the universe falls into an order in which eventually, smart people will start asking clever questions that explain everything (this is a very loose transcription of what he said, lol). In the second take, Sheldon added “someone clever like me asking this question now” and smiles smugly.
Leonard says he knows what Sheldon is talking about. Sheldon says “Of course you do, I just explained it to you”. Sheldon says he totally agrees with the principle and asks Leonard what about him. In the first take, he says “I’m anti it”. In the second take, Leonard says “I believe that God created the universe in 6 days, and in the seventh, he created you to annoy me”.
Raj walks in and Sheldon asks him if he agrees with said principle. Raj says “absolutely”. Leonard asks Sheldon why he assumed that Raj knew what he was talking about. Sheldon says “Leonard, don’t saw off the branch tree you’re sitting on” (I just found out that it means “don’t bite the hand that feeds you”)
Raj asks what their plans are for tonight because he just heard of this spa where little fish nibble the bacteria and excess flesh off their feet. He comments on California’s good weather which means that it is sandals season all year ‘round, and he shows off his new $285 sandals.
Sheldon says that if a sea creature is going to eat him, it would be a Kraken because the last words he would ever hear are “Release the Kraken”. He says it again “RELEASE THE KRAKEN” and then “it never gets old” while he cracks himself up. Leonard says he has plans to hang out with Penny. Sheldon tells Raj that he has a dinner date with Amy. Raj looks disappointed and he says “that’s Ok. I’ll just do what I always do, cry alone”. Sheldon says that’s too bad, “if you weren’t busy I would ask you to join us for dinner”. Raj perks up and says “Really? That would be great!” Leonard asks Sheldon if he’s sure that’s a good idea. Sheldon says “Yes, per the RA, I’m contractually obligated to take Amy out on a date for our anniversary and engage in physical contact. It doesn’t say I can’t outsource it to an Indian man”. They shot three Raj reactions: blank face, confused and like he was thinking about it.
Scene 4: Space Station
H/B in Skype session. She asks how he’s doing and he says he’s having a great time, very enthusiastically. Bernadette does not look amused. She says sarcastically “Great, I just had dinner with your mom and she mentioned that you did not tell her about our moving plans”. Howard says he hasn’t had the chance to discuss it with his mom. Howard asks “Are you Ok?” Bernadette: “Are you getting a clear image of me there?” Howard: “Yes…” Bernadette (angrily): “Does it look like I’m Ok?” Howard says it’s not like he’s getting HD up there and tries to distract her with a floating pen. When he realizes it is not working, he promises to talk to his mom again. Bernadette says “Remember what I said I’d do as soon as you get back? Well, you BETTER FIX THIS or you’ll have to DO IT TO YOURSELF!” Howard knows he’s in trouble.
Scene 5: Fancy new restaurant
Amy and Sheldon enter the restaurant. Amy and Sheldon are dressed up. She’s wearing a black dress with a collar and a high waist belt. She’s wearing a jacket too. Sheldon is wearing a tan dinner jacket and nice pants. Amy is impressed with the restaurant. She says it is romantic. Sheldon says that Raj picked it. Amy tells Sheldon to thank Raj on her behalf next time he sees him. Sheldon says “You can thank him yourself. He’s sitting right over there”, and waves at Raj who is sitting at a table. In the first take, Raj just waves back and we see him from his back. They did a few other takes where the camera is on Raj and he says “Yoo hoo” and waves enthusiastically.
Amy and Sheldon walk towards the table. As they go, Amy asks what Raj is doing there. She’s upset. “This was supposed to be our date”. Sheldon says that the RA states he will take her out but it doesn’t specify he can’t invite other people. It’s a loophole. Amy’s disappointed. In the first take, Sheldon turns to her and says “I told you to get a lawyer” and smiles. In the second take, Sheldon adds that in addition to being a master physicist, he’s a legal eagle, then he winks at her. In another take, instead of winking, he does the double finger gun. In the last take, he does the wink and the double finger gun.
When they get to the table, Raj says “Sorry I started without you [he’s drinking wine], but this is my first date in a while and I was nervous”. Amy and Sheldon sit opposite each other and Raj is in the middle. Amy says “Can’t believe I bleached my mustache for this!” Raj says “next time, you should go to my girl. She would do a much better job”. In a later take, Raj added “and she will take care of those sideburns for free” and points to the sideburns. Sheldon just looks up from the menu and smiles. Amy is not amused.
Scene 6: Restaurant
Raj tells Amy that they haven’t had the chance to get to know each other and they should take this opportunity to start. He says “You go first”. Amy says “Go home”. To Sheldon: “I can’t believe you’d do this to me. We are celebrating our second anniversary of our first date!” Raj says “Oh, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know” and looks upset. Then he calls the waiter and asks for “champagne…and 3 glasses!” He says “Isn’t this romantic?” Sheldon says “That must be a rhetoric question since I wouldn’t know”.
Scene 7: Leonard and Sheldon’s apartment
Leonard is at his apartment. He’s wearing this green Recycle symbol t-shirt and no hoodie. He’s bringing something from the kitchen when Penny knocks and let’s herself in. She sees the spread on the coffee table and asks “What’s all this?” Leonard says that he knows things between them have been weird lately and he wanted to do something nice for her. He got wings, sliders and beer, and says that they can watch football tonight. The evening is all about Penny and she should relax. He raises his t-shirt. ‘Go Sports!” is written on his belly. Penny says “Go Sports?” Leonard says he didn’t know if she’d like to watch baseball instead and he didn’t want to look ridiculous in that case. She says “Aw, it’s all so nice, thank you. I’ve had a tough day at work. I’m exhausted and just need to relax” They sit down on the couch to watch TV. Leonard asks “So where are we at now in our relationship?” Penny sighs in frustration and says she just wants to relax. She doesn’t want to talk about it now. Leonard says that the longer they wait, the weirder it will get between them. Penny says that for once, she’d like to be the girl in their relationship. Leonard says “Fine, I’m the guy. You’re the girl. Just relax and I’ll fix you a plate”. There’s a knock at the door. Leonard says he’ll get it and as he passes Penny, he raises his shirt and says “Go Sports!” again.
Raj is at the door. Leonard says “Aren’t you supposed to be with Sheldon and Amy?” Raj says he felt like a third wheeler so he thought he could come and hang out with them instead. Leonard says in a low voice that Raj should go because he has issues to discuss with Penny. In the first take, we hear Penny say “No, we don’t. Come on in.” but the camera is on Raj and Leonard. In another take, the camera was on Penny as she said it. Leonard says “Can’t believe I shaved my chest for this!” and lets Raj into the apartment.
Scene 8: Space Station
Howard is working on something as Dimitri comes into view. He’s upside down. He says that a woman is on the phone for Howard. Howard asks “Who is it?” Dimitri says “She said she’s your mother but sounds like your father” They put her through and Howard ask her why she’s on the phone instead of using the computer. She says she won’t use that ferkakta computer. What if she gets a computer virus? Howard says “You can’t catch a virus from a computer, Ma!” He’s annoyed. She’s calling to complain that Bernadette said something about moving out again. She might as well lay in her grave now because she’ll be all alone. Everyone leaves her. Howard basically blames it on Bernadette. Mom says “I knew it was her idea! You can’t let a woman tell you what to do!” Howard says he’ll talk to Bernadette again. Dimitri is overhearing all of this and he says he can’t believe these are the same people that stopped the Cold war. Then we get a view from outside of the space stations while Howard tells his mom that everyone can hear her so let’s change the topic. She says “Then lets talk about why you’ve been gone so long and you haven’t even sent me a letter yet”.
Scene 9: Leonard and Sheldon’s apartment
Penny/Raj/Leonard on the couch drinking beer. Raj is in the middle leaning on Penny’s shoulder. Raj says that football is pretty fun. “Not ball to the wall fun like badminton or cricket but then again, what is?”
Penny asks the guys if they want another beer and they say no. She stares at them and says “Girls”. She goes to the kitchen.
Raj tells Leonard that he’s having a lot of fun. Leonard says “Great” (sarcastically). Raj says “You know you guys are like family to me”. Leonard says “that’s great, now get out. Penny and I have issues to discuss”. Raj says “I understand…. Communication is the cornerstone of every relationship”. Penny’s back from the kitchen but she’s leaning on Leonard’s chair, facing both Leonard and Raj. Raj says that they don’t really have any issues. They’ve had some bumps but they’ve got through them. For example, Penny has always known how Leonard feels about her yet she lets him grovel at her feet. Penny begins to protest but Raj says “Don’t blame yourself. He’s been a groveler from way back”. And then Leonard proposed during sex but Penny’s stuck by him. Leonard says that some people might find that romantic. Raj says “Yeah….no. That’s weak tea, dude! The important thing is that you can go through all this and still look into each other’s eyes and say ‘I love you’” Leonard: “Actually, she hasn’t said it back”. Raj says “What?!? THAT’S RIDICULOUS. (to Penny) You need to say it now. Look into his eyes and say it. Say it. SAY IT.”
CUT TO (Pre-taped): The apartment door is closed in Raj’s face.
Scene 10: The restaurant
Amy is holding a glass of champagne and tips it slightly towards Sheldon. “Have I told you that you look like a sexy praying mantis?” Sheldon: “Yes, every time you drink”. Amy” “The thing about praying is that they devour their mate” Sheldon: “Your point being?” Amy unbuttons her collar and says: “Dessert is served” (she said this the same way she said “dirty, dirty, dirty” in TAD). Sheldon looks unfazed. He says “I just had a cobbler”
Amy’s frustrated. She gets up to leave and says “I’m done”. She starts to walk away but Sheldon says “You can’t leave. I need you!” Amy turns back. She looks touched. “Really? You need me?” Sheldon says sincerely “Yes, you are my ride”. Amy is angry now and says “That’s it! Either you say something from the heart or we are through!” Sheldon gets really serious and says “Ok, come, sit here” (points to the chair next to him, where Raj was sitting before). Amy sits down. Then he says the following in earnest (think apology from TVS but more intense).
“When I look into your eyes, and you look into mine, I don’t feel quite normal.
I feel stronger and weaker at the same time. I feel excited and I feel terrified, and honestly I don’t know what I’m feeling but I know the kind of man I want to be.”
Amy’s really touched. “Sheldon, that’s beautiful”
In the first take, he said “I should hope so; it’s from Spiderman”. Amy looks on incredulously.
Sheldon says “You said it had to be from the heart. You didn’t say whose heart. See, loophole!”
Amy simply says “Take the bus” and storms off. Sheldon runs after her yelling “Ok, our two hearts beat as one! Your sweater is nice! You smell like soap!”, each sounding increasingly desperate.
In the second take, after Sheldon says “I should hope so; it’s from Spiderman”, Amy looks satisfied and says “I’ll take it”. He smiles at her and then takes his wallet out and says “So, we are splitting the check, right?”
Scene 11: Comic Book store, later that night
Stuart is alone in the store folding some t-shirts. Raj comes in and asks if it is still open. Stuart says that he was about to close but Raj can stay if he wants. “You are my first customer today”. Stuart asks Raj if he wants a drink. Raj asks “What have you got?” Stuart: “Coffee liquor in a Chewbacca mug.” In the first 2 takes, Raj says “Classy” (sincerely). In the rest of the takes, Stuart also calls the drink “sad-tini” and Raj replies “That’s appropriate, the way things have gone for me today”. Raj says he doesn’t like to drink alone so sometimes he puts a shot (later changed to chardonnay) in his puppy’s bow. “She’s a mean drunk”. [Kunal said ‘he’ instead of ‘she’ when referring to the puppy a couple of times so they did a few takes]. Stuart serves the drinks and asks Raj if he wants to listen to some music. Raj says “Sure”. Stuart puts some Latin music. Raj says: “Hmmm, bosanova. It begs to be listened with your ears and your hips” as he starts to undulate his hips. Stuart also starts to move his hips. Raj comments on how Latin music makes him think of beaches and sand. Stuart says: “Tanned bodies… glistening… sweat…” Both are still dancing rhythmically and they look like they are imagining the things they are saying. They look at each other, realize what they are doing and stop, looking very uncomfortable. Raj says: “I should go”. [The whole dancing scene was done a few times without major changes. I think they didn’t like the dancing.] Stuart says good night. Raj heads to the door, but then he turns around and asks Stuart if he would be interested in hanging out, “have dinner, watch a movie”. Stuart says sure, but his funds are tight. Raj smiles and says not to worry, it’s on him, “pick you up tomorrow after work?”. Stuart agrees and Raj leaves. Stuart goes back to folding t-shirts. Suddenly, he realizes what he’s done but then says “Eh, I could do worse”.
Scene 12 (Tag): Space Station
Howard is in a Skype session with Bernadette. She looks happy because Howard says that he told his mom they’re moving out and she’s ok with it. Dimitri floats into view. He’s lying horizontally and heading towards Howard. He heard the conversation. When Bernie hangs up, Dimitri chastises Howard for lying to both his mom and his wife. “What are you going to do when you get back?” Howard says: “I am never going back”, as he pushes Dimitri out of view by gently pushing his head.